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If, when we
were very young, we had any kind of trauma, abuse, abandonment,
or even just confusion in early childhood, it set up a deep
pain in our core beings.
To cope with
this pain and suffering, we created, unconsciously, a unique survival
strategy that enabled us to survive and make our way through life.
We took on ideas
and beliefs about the reality of ourselves and life, as a way of
dealing with the pain, fear and confusion, and as a guide on how
to act.
As adults, we
continue to create the content and experience of our lives according
to those beliefs and survival strategies.
We manipulate
the people and events around us, to get them to collude with and
confirm our world view.
Unfortunately,
that way of being is not so useful to us now - it's creating a new
kind of pain and suffering,
through inappropriate, unconscious self-limitation and conflict.
Eventually,
some just give up and remain in limited, closed-down lives with
their wondrous intelligence, consciousness and life, locked
away, suppressed and inactive.
Asleep.
Competing
forces in our beings:
There are three
competing forces
in our individual beings that create these outcomes:
1. Our genes have their own imperatives that drive what we do much
of the time.
2. Ideas and beliefs (memes) have their own drives too, and compete
for space in the habitat of our psyches. The needs of these idea-constructs
are often in conflict with our DNA's needs.
3. Conscious awareness. At some stage it attempts to free
itself from, or come to terms with in some way, the stranglehold
of the genes and the memes.
There is also
another set of competing dynamics in our lives:
1. DNA / meme / consciousness imperatives as above.
2. Societal expectations.
3. Individual adaptive survival behaviours.
4. The healing/balancing function of the survival mechanism.
Each of these
dynamics can have different needs to each of the others.
It's
not surprising that life is full of chaos, confusion, pain, and
suffering!
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